Short Hair Don't Care

I spontaneously chopped off my locks a couple weeks ago. I had a few shoots back to back and was getting really bored of my long hair. I knew I had this shoot coming up with Raul so I figured it was the perfect time for a change!

I feel like the short hair gives me extra height. I know everyone loves long hair and a lot of my friends told me not to cut it but when you're on the shorter side, short hair can potentially makes you look taller. If you're petite and your hair is too long it can swallow you up.

I can't wait to share the rest of this shoot because Raul totally captured my personality. We had so much fun. 

Fashion shoots don't always have to be so serious. A little sass and class never hurt anyone.

I'm FREEEEEE! I feel so light and almost like a new person. 

I didn't tell anyone I was cutting my hair. After I chopped it off, I met my friends for dinner, one of my best girl friends walked in and just kept looking at me. She even took off her glasses, rubbed her eyes and continued looking at me from a distance. She was legitimately confused, it wasn't until I waved her down that she realized it was me! 

Funny how social media is a way to keep in touch with friends. That weekend I said hi to a couple of my friends at church and they also didn't recognize me. I got texts afterwards saying "omg, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize that was you! Your hair is still long on instagram!"

I think social media is a great way to stay connected but I also feel like it's important to be connected offline as well. I love instagram but I feel so limited. I feel like I can't post as freely or as often. I think this is why I'm enjoying blogging so much. I can share more of who I am and I don't have to worry about bothering anyone with "too many posts". 

Jacket Adelina Rusu, Top Masaki Matsuka, Jeans Revice

Photography by Raul Romo
Styling by Katie Qian
Make up & Hair by Francie Tomalonis
Bts by Eunice Lee

Don't wear yellow because you're yellow.

I love shooting outdoors. Wind in my face and natural light. It's like the Universe bringing it all together for the perfect shot. 

This is my favorite look from the series I shot with Luke Rieke. I shared a sneak peek last week and we've got a bunch more coming so make sure to stay tuned. 

Los Angeles has so much character. Sometimes I forget how big this city is. So many souls, so many stories. Everyone busy and just trying to survive. 

I love this UNIF sweater Katie styled me in, I would never think to wear it or buy something like this because it's so bold. But it feels quite empowering. Maybe I should start wearing more primary colors. 

Someone once told me I shouldn't wear yellow because I'm yellow and it's not going to be flattering on me. I think I might disagree. I might actually like yellow on me. Sometimes it's best to take someone else's opinion with a grain of salt. 

I'm working on listening to myself more and caring less about the opinion of others. Especially when it's racist, I'm not actually yellow. I think I hear things like this so often it doesn't even phase me anymore. I don't think that's a good thing, it shouldn't be normal.

Took me 30 years to be comfortable in my own skin and most my life I felt like I was an alien. I never felt like I fit in or I belonged. I'm not sure when that started to change but I know the last few years have been about embracing who I am. Loving myself, even the flaws. 

Don't judge yourself because you're different. 

This skirt from Stylenanda is so fun, the silver grommets are everything! Also another piece I would not gravitate towards naturally! This is why Katie is so good and so necessary. 

I love this shot of my feet dangling but now I wish I could clean my shoes. I always struggle keeping my white sneakers clean. Probably because I wear them every day. 

All Photography by Luke Rieke
Make Up & Hair by Sara Tagaloa
Wardrobe Styling by Katie Qian
Assisted by Eunice Lee

Get that Vitamin D!

If you're feeling blue go outside and get some Vitamin D, sunshine always cheers me up! I walk Chewy 3-4 times a day, that's at least an hour of sunlight and it does wonders for me. Couple times a week we go for a hike as well. I'm more energetic during the days and I sleep better at night. Whenever I'm feeling sluggish a brisk walk outside always does the trick. 

Here I am trying to tie a high pony without a mirror, how'd I do?  

Photos by the amazing Robby M this is one of my favorite every day looks from a fun shoot we had in Downtown LA, video shot by Eunice coming soon on my channel. 

Kisses! Now get off your phone or computer and go get some sun!! 

Sweater: Pam & Gela Lace up (size P)
Watch: Leonard & Church Varick 
Sunnies: Perverse Sunglasses
Jeans: Nobody Geo Skinny (size 26)

Do you have three faces?

Someone recently told me that everyone has three faces. The first face, you show to the world. The second face, you show to your close friends and your family. The third face, you never show anyone. It is the truest reflection of who you are. I found this to be fascinating because I always thought I was just an open book. 

I'm fairly open & honest about my life unless it involves someone else. Respecting the privacy of those I care for is really important to me. I'm also not good at hiding my emotions or lying. If I don't like something or someone you'll see it written all over my face. On the flip side, if I like something, I won't be able to hide my excitement. I either LOVE it or HATE it, no room for the in-between.

Lets take food for example, if it's a hot dish, I like it sizzling hot and if it's a cold dish, I like it ice cold. I hate anything that's lukewarm. This reflects a lot in my life as well. I'm passionate about the things I do and the things I love. So that intensity really excites me and lukewarmness is the exact opposite. I consider it lazy to have a lukewarm attitude towards life. If you're going to do something, do it! Do it with all your heart and be great! Revelation 3:15-17

Now that I think about it, I'm fairly closed off in big public settings or work environments, mainly because it's intimidating and terrifying. I can come off a bit standoffish if I'm feeling uncomfortable. It's an INFP (Myers-Briggs) thing, we're constantly misunderstood. I'll elaborate on INFP struggles on another blog post. I also act a lot tougher than I am to those I'm not as close with. But my friends know I'm pretty sensitive and a total softie. I put less of a face on with my friends so they get to see the real arden. I'm awkward, clumsy, insecure, shy, incredibly forgetful - borderline needing professional help and I talk way too fast. Mainly because if I talk slowly mid sentence I'll forget what I was saying and completely lose my train of thought. Does this happen to anyone else?

I feel like my closest friends see it all. They've seen me ugly cry, they've seen me heartbroken, they've seen me angry and much more. I'm really open with my close friends because I believe your friendships can only be as deep as you allow them to be. If you want real intimate friendships you've got to be vulnerable and open up. Friendships are hard work and you need to invest your time into them but they're so essential to a healthy life. I'm so thankful for my friends that are my community and my family. They keep me accountable and grounded, I don't know what I'd do without them. 

Whenever I dress like this I have a few friends who love to tease me. You look like a boy. But what's wrong with that? Why do guys get all the cool clothes? This is a mans jacket from the mens section but I love it! I can wear this, eat two pizzas and no one would know. All about comfort baby!

I just bought this cap and I'm in LOVE. I usually wear a black cap but since the weather's getting warmer I feel like this off-white colored cap is very fitting for the season. It's become a new favorite. I love hats and covering half my face, it oddly makes me feel safe. Maybe I do have three faces after all. There are definitely times when I feel the safest alone. But I still identify with all three faces, they all make me who I am. 

When you're fixing your hair but it almost looks like dancing. Photography by Robby M 

New York

One of my favorite experiences during Fashion Week last year was shooting with Leonardo Corredor. It took me so far out of my comfort zone. But I loved it. I never got to share all of the photos so I figured I'd do that here.

This was hands down my favorite images from the shoot. I'm not quite sure why but it makes me feel like a painting and I'm honored to feel like my image became art. 

My dreams of being tall come true in photoshoots with long gowns and killer heels. But thank you Leo, this photo gives me life. 

I rarely shoot anything like this. I think it's because I feel vulnerable & naked. Or just plain awkward. But I'm happy we did it, I love how it turned out and I think I'll look back at it many years from now and be happy that I was comfortable enough to take this photo, despite the tiny body suit and snow falling on me in the -0 degree weather. Yes, it was snowing while I took this photo and yes, I was standing outside on the busy streets of New York. Half naked. I got quite a number of funny looks. 

This is probably my second favorite photo of the batch. I love it because it makes me feel so sexy and I rarely feel sexy. I also love the hair naturally falling in my face. I don't know why but I really love hair in the face. I almost wish I always had hair in my face like Violet from The Incredibles. 

I really fear taking photos straight on like this. But when you have a good glam team it sure does build the confidence. Thank you Jonathan for making my face look like this. This photo also freaked me out a bit because people kept commenting that I looked like TOP from Big Bang, I wasn't sure if that was an insult or a compliement. But I'll choose to take it as a compliment. Maybe we can play siblings one day. 

Photography - Leonardo Corredor | Make up - Jonathan Wu | Nails - Sooah | Hair - Kat Koncept | Styling - Allan Troy

Do we always want what we don't have?

I shot with Luke Rieke last week, an incredibly talented photographer from the East Coast. We worked with Sara Tagaloa & Katie Qian both talented and sweet women. I shared a couple of the photos on my instagram with a caption mentioning how excited I was about these shots because of my "fake" freckles. But I was shocked to see how many of my freckled friends commented that I was crazy for wanting freckles. Or saying that they hated their freckles. I feel like freckles bring so much character to a face. I have a few moles, or "spots" on my face and when I was young my dad used to joke and say an ant walked around my face and pooped everywhere. I thought they were weird until he said that. Then I felt like it was special, he made something I was insecure about into a funny story. So whenever someone would point them out, I'd proudly say "an ant pooped all over my face" and we'd laugh together.

People often define beauty as symmetry and maybe freckles are not thought to be beautiful because they're not symmetrical or in any order. But what I've noticed is when photographers photoshop them out or make up artists cover them up, my face looks naked. I hate it. They're a part of my face and they're a part of me. I guess I don't find perfection to be beautiful. I honestly think perfection is boring. A crooked smile has so much depth. Every wrinkle has a memory. Every scar has a story.

Freckles are beautiful, unique and can never be replicated. I've had them painted on for two shoots and I find myself asking more and more "can we do freckles"? It might even be a trend, I hear people are getting them tattooed onto their faces these days. But I guess this just comes to show how much the grass is greener on the other side. I have straight hair so I want curly hair. I'm short so I want to be tall. My tall girl friends want to be short. I have double eyelids but I want monolids. While my friends with monolids get surgery for double eye lids. Do we always want what we don't have? 

I know I'm guilty of it. I guess that's why I love acting so much. Stepping into someone else's shoes and living a different life for a day, a moment or a series. My favorite part of photoshoots is transforming into someone else or being the character I don't have the confidence to be in real life. Or even something as terrifying as stripping away the layers and being vulnerable. 

I think I find realness to be the most beautiful. But it's hard. Especially with the pressure to be perfect. Honestly when I look at these images, my first initial thought is I look ugly. Disclaimer: I asked Sara (the make up artist) if we could go with this look, I wanted this no lashes, no liner and I think she did an amazing job. But I love false lashes and lash extensions, they make me feel beautiful and I used to not be able to leave the house without eyeliner but this year I've gone months without. I'm trying to love myself without all the glitz and glam. At least for this season. Don't get me wrong, I think it's great to get dolled up and feel beautiful but I also think it's important to be able to look at yourself as who you are and love that face underneath all the make up.